But that would belittle the name of our moon, which is the Moon

I never liked Boston. One of the worst travel experiences of my life was driving through that stupid city. The hotel lost our reservation and we had to pay more for a suite, parking is like $1,000 an hour, and the restaurant we went to refused to seat us. We ended up getting lost by the waterfront, accosted by some Bean-town boys, and eating Boston Market in our hotel room. I always assumed that this terrible trip was the split result of my own failure to plan and Boston’s east-coast brusqueness.

After this whole ATHF incident, however, I am ready to revise my opinion of this trip and blame it completely on Boston. Obviously, this is a stupid city full of stupid people who think Lite Brites are bombs (or IEDs). No one can plan a good trip to a city this dumb. The mayor of Boston may be the whiniest bitch I have ever heard and I’m sick that he continues to justify the over-reaction of the entire city agency. The only thing we know for sure is that the populous of Boston is dumber than that of New York, Los Angeles, Chicago, Atlanta, Seattle, Portland, Austin, San Francisco, and Philadelphia. In all of these cities, people drove by a light board that was flipping them off and either laughed or ignored it. Well done, everyone but Boston.

"'I think Turner learned a lesson: that they will not tolerate this type of advertising any further,' Boston Mayor Thomas Menino told reporters." No, you fucktard, Turner Broadcasting learned that for a mere $2 million, they can get front page coverage on every major paper and website and introduce the show ATHF to millions of people that have never watched it, all while making the citizens of an entire metropolitan city look like a bunch of rubes. That is the best inverse ratio for advertising ever. This is why guerilla marketing is so brilliant. Even when it goes wrong, it goes right.

“He said he had no regrets about the city's response. ‘I would just say that the folks who second-guessed us because we did go out and do our work, shame on them.’” Umm, okay, duly noted. This guy really runs a whole city? I have half a mind to assemble a board that reads “NOT A BOMB” and hang them up all over Boston. I'm sure I'm not the only one.

This is really a shame, since ATHF bestowed the highest honors of the "ultimate song" to More than a Feeling, by, you guessed it, Boston.